4 RULES FOR ONLINE DATING FIRST MESSAGES - ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW

Here are the 4 golden rules and all you need to know for sending first messages to somebody new who has similar interests as you in online dating.

The first and foremost thing you need to know before sending your first messages to people on your favourite online dating app is the fact that these are real people you are talking to who have also taken to this whole new world of connecting with people digitally. Don't ever think that just because you are physically not talking to a person, but rather barricaded behind your device's screen that it changes anything. Keep it clean, keep it respectful, and have fun!

When you have filtered through many profiles and found a select few that you really like in terms of personality, common interests and looks, now it is the time to start sending your first messages, but how exactly do you do it? Also, what do you do if you do not get a reply from the people who you have messaged? Well, that will bring us onto the 4 golden rules for sending first messages and how to leave a fantastic first impression and to help you stand out from those who have already sent messages before you.

Another very important aspect after you have sent your first messages is keeping the conversation going, keeping it exciting, relevant, and ongoing!

Now that brings us to sending your first messages in online dating and all that you need to know.

Here is our guide on the 4 rules for online dating first messages:

• Keep it clean and not raunchy!

At first, many people might find the world of online dating rather exhilarating and exciting, it is very important to make sure your first messages are not explicit, inappropriate or ranchy in any shape or form, be sure to keep it P.G.!

You will never leave a good first impression if you start off by using inappropriate terms, getting straight to third base and skipping one and two. You have to come across as open, interesting and as someone you can connect with, you know, like having something in common!

• Don't send deep-meaning messages right away

Nobody wants a first message that goes on the lines of: "Hey I came across your profile and liked it, I also am looking for a meaningful relationship, I just got out of a terrible one and want someone who understands me, knows my mood swings, adores my cat and lets me be who I want to be whenever I want to and I love spending time with my mom, she is everything to me and nobody comes between us"

Back it up a little, everyone has their personal issues, but is that a good way to start a conversation with someone who you are messaging first? No, not by a long shot!

Keep it brief, to the point, and not about you! Don't use terms such as "I'm a nice guy". Try wording your first messages as if you were talking to them face to face, and keep your personal flavour there, but don't overdo it and come across as creepy and or needy, nobody likes that!

• Keep it original for each person, no one is the same (avoid copying & pasting messages!)

Online dating might seem daunting at first as you might have to contact tens or even hundreds of people in order to find your perfect match, but keep in mind it will be worth it in the long run.

A very common beginner mistake is to write out one message and essentially copy and paste it to all the people you have decided to contact.

Nobody is the same, each person has different interests. You will score big points if you rather take the approach of complimenting someone on their profile picture and keeping it personal such as "Hey there, I saw your profile, read up on your interest and hobbies and I share a lot of the same with you, I love hiking and going on adventurous vacations as well, and by the way, that necklace you're wearing in your profile picture is absolutely beautiful and compliments you"

• The messaging structure rule of 3.

Okay, so you have reached the point where you have a fair idea of the do's and don'ts of sending your first messages to people in online dating, but how would you actually structure it? Here are our tips on doing exactly that with this helpful rule of 3:

First of all, start with an introduction of yourself and keep in mind the three topics we learnt so far. Everyone has to start with a "hello", and make sure to keep your sentences vibrant, inviting and presentable, stay away from profanity and sexually explicit wording.